sorrowful hope or hopeful sorrow

it is now when i feel un-mended
that lifesaving thoughts are rendered as un-comprehended
and the cares of my life that i unwillingly defended
leaves my hand mutilated and indented

can i admit that hope is more than my imaginary friend?
when i am broken what does it mean to pretend?

the times that i cry over my beautiful tears
or nurture my wounds given by fears
as i walk the line between hopeful brokenness
and sorrowful despair
i give you the throne of sorrow
as i surrender my cares

even though the flowers of hope are unseen for a while
and the weeds of sorrow seem empowered as they smile
i trust you as the enemy triumphs and targets my pain
you have given true roots that in the darkness remain